An editorial in the National Review — where no one apparently wanted to attach their name to the piece — mocked Sotomayor’s “wise Latina” reputation and called her “illiterate.”
"Her opinion is legally illiterate and logically indefensible," the editorial read. "And the still-young career of this self-described ‘wise Latina’ on the Supreme Court already offers a case study in the moral and legal corrosion that inevitably results from elevating ethnic-identity politics over the law."
Other critics — read: white men — called Sotomayor “overheated” and fueled by “emotion” — coded language that has been used in the past to discredit or marginalize women and minorities.
If you’re in an abusive relationship, to make abuse stop, you’ve got to get away and stay away. Here’s help to leave safely, and to stay as safe as you can before you leave.
“You don’t need to hate the person or people you are leaving: It doesn’t matter what kind of a person they are “deep down.” They are abusive because of what they do, not because of who they are. This also isn’t about how you feel about them. However you may feel, they are hurting you and it has to stop. They probably won’t stop it, and they will not take good care of you, so you need to do what you can to stop it by taking good care of yourself.
If you feel torn over what this decision says about them, or worried about hurting their feelings by leaving, it can help to remember that we don’t help anyone by giving them opportunities to hurt people. Their lives, like ours, are not made better by abuse. They do not feel better when being abusive, just like we do not feel better by being abused. By leaving, and doing what we can to make abuse stop, we are not just helping ourselves: we are also doing the best — and really, the only — thing we can to help an abusive person or group by no longer enabling their abuse, and helping to get them out of abusive patterns, too.
A big part of loving someone well is doing what we can to help them be their best selves: no one can be their best self when they are not safe, and no one can be their best self when they are doing someone harm. So, if you feel like you can’t leave because that isn’t showing them love, consider that leaving someone abusive can be much more loving than staying is. This is about you, not them, and what you need to do to get safe and make abuse stop; but getting away from abuse, and taking away people’s opportunities to do harm to others, ultimately benefits everyone.”
It’s hard to shake the idea that Game Of Thrones, the show, doesn’t see a problem with pushing a scene from complicated, consensual sex to outright rape. It would be easier to accept that idea if it were clear what the show was trying to do with those changes. Rape is a tricky thing to use as character development, for either the victim or the rapist; doing it twice raises a lot of red flags. It assumes that rape between characters doesn’t fundamentally change the rest of their story—and it assumes that the difference between consent and rape is, to use the parlance, a “blurred line.”
Unfortunately, the show is wrong, on both counts. Changing a scene from consensual sex to rape is not just a pedantic issue of accuracy—it’s a problem with story. The Daenerys Targaryen who falls in love with a man who granted her respect when no one else would is different from the Daenerys Targaryen who fell in love with her rapist. It changes that relationship. (Dany falling in love with Drogo, and calling him her “sun and stars,” makes a whole lot more sense now, doesn’t it?)
Similarly, Jaime is a figure of chivalric love in the books—despite his arrogance and ruthlessness, his devotion and sense of duty to Cersei, the only woman he has ever loved, is so fervent as to border on adoration. Admittedly, the show can’t rely on his point-of-view chapters, as the book does, to communicate that love. But given what we have seen Cersei Lannister capable of—her ex-husband is hardly the only man she’s had killed—is it even conceivable that she would stand for it? Jaime raping Cersei is a major anomaly for these two characters—even based purely on what we’ve seen in the show. It’s just not something that either character would do.
oh no a boy doesnt like my apperance whatever will i do